Just The Wei I Am

It finally happened. Last night, I spent a few hours cleaning up my computers and my room. I uninstalled all the unlicensed programs, deleted mp3s I didn't buy, deleted installers, uninstalled file-sharing tools, threw away pirated CDs, VCDs, even CD-Rs. Imitation handphone casing also. Photocopy of entire book.

I can say that my laptop is currently 'clean' as far as i can tell, there might be small little pieces hiding somewhere i missed. I'll reinstall the OS (which is licensed! haha) soon to really clean it up thoroughly and to make sure.

Physically, my room is more difficult, I threw away the stuff i could think of and recall. i'll be spring cleaning and rearranging my room soon, so anything i spot then will go too.

Ah, my desktop is tricky also. The OS is unlicensed! Thankfully I have an unused licensed Windows 2000 =) And I haven't been using the desktop and the files are so messy.. This one is a bigger task, but hold me to it - I'll clean it up too. I've already done as much as I could last night, uninstalling and deleting the obvious.

It's not easy, because I do desire to have those things.

• Great programs like Photoshop which I've used since Sec 2 and have become proficient in. I've used from version 2.5 to version 7, and have grown to love this powerful program. I never installed the latest version because it's sitting in the trashbag now.


• Lots of mp3s - I love music and have quite a lot of nice mp3s from all over. Copied from friends, downloaded, ripped from CDs belonging to others. Some of it was really cool stuff, like the whole folder full of a capella songs. It's almost embarrassing to mention that there were alot of Christian mp3s that don't belong to me.


• Classic book on linguistics by Halliday. The book is so old, I doubt you can buy a copy even if you want. So I zapped the whole book.
  
• Oh man! All my favourite PC games from Sec Sch days. I really enjoyed these games when I was younger, and they are so so nostalgic. Think Prince of Persia. They have to go too.

If you ask me why, I can't point to anything in particular that triggered this. Ferlene and Yin San chided me a bit, but it didn't strike that big a chord. Jinhang and I did talk about it being a bad testimony a few days ago.

I think most of us use/have pirated stuff and we do know that it's wrong. It's simply that we rationalise and give excuses/justifications for it. My favourite one is: this is a beneficial and useful program, but I can't afford it. But that doesn't justify stealing.

I made the decision yesterday morning, and looked forward to getting home to do it, and that was the first thing i did when i got home. To make a decision to clean up was not in realising that it's wrong (because I knew all the time) but rather to simply make a decision to want to do the right thing uncompromisingly.

I have a feeling the topmost consideration a lot of us might have is: Is this a stumbling block to people? Will it be a bad testimony? (1Cor10:32) But it seems that most of us might have decided that it was "safe", people won't see it as such a big deal since it's so common, and won't be stumbled.

Perhaps. But then, even if nobody is stumbled, is it right? The 8th commandment is "You shall not steal", the 10th one is "You shall not covet your neighbour's house... or anything that belongs to your neighbour." This isn't rocket-science theology. God isn't happy when I have pirated stuff. The freedom that Jesus bought for me is not for me to be free to rip CDs and install pirated games.

For me, cleaning up was not because of worrying about my testimony, but simply because I want to please God. Perspective: It's not the kind of pleasing like pleasing your boss to get in his good books. It's the kind of pleasing like pleasing someone you love because you want him/her to be happy. So yes, it's simply that I don't want God to be unhappy because of (not with) me having pirated stuff.

Oh, and about the testimony bit, you know what? Even if people are not stumbled by our having pirated stuff, it makes no impact. On the other hand, now that I've cleaned up, if someone ask me if I use pirated software or have pirated music, I can confidently say "No"..

Haha, and yes, I uninstalled the bible from my PocketPC. Back to paper.

Well, my laptop is really clean now, with not even a vestige of pirated stuff left. Reformatted it and reinstalled XP, hoping to install Solaris 10 as my OS also.

When I shared with Yeu Ann yesterday when we met up, I mentioned that even as I decided to delete all my pirated software, it did occur to me that some of them were useful and their function necessary (eg. I really need a photo manipulation software like Photoshop). But that concern did not sway me from my decision. Instead, as I told YA, I had this assurance that as I did the right thing, God will provide for me.

Imagine how pleased I was to discover that IBM includes a copy of my favourite anti-virus software - Norton AntiVirus - on the original Recovery CDs! It seems that NUS uninstalled it, installing the campus-wide Trend-Micro OfficeScan, and that's why I never knew all along that I owned a copy of Norton! I certainly didn't know when I went about uninstalling stuff. Haha, the pirated copy I had was the 2002 version. Now I have the 2004 version legitimately! God is good...