Just The Wei I Am

This leopard doesn't change its spots. Yeah, I did it again. Term paper. 'nuff said. It wasn't that bad this time round, only one and a half weeks.

I don't want to sound like I'm actually proud of this bad habit. I'm not. In fact, I hate it. I don't even like to talk about it; often others bring up the topic. So what do I say? Be assured that I hate it ...

Why do I hate it?

One. It's tormenting ... Days spent fretting about the overdue work and not actually lifting a finger. Not daring to go to class. Avoiding the canteen your lecturer is likely to eat at. Most draining of all: staying up odd hours hoping to finish it at one shot but ending up sleep-deprived, and the work's still not done.

Two. More importantly, I hate it because it's another example of bad stewardship of time. I'm a horrible steward of time. I must discipline myself to see time as not belonging to me, but to God. "So what have you done with the 24 hours I've given you to look after?" "Eh .... urm .... well ...." I don't want to find out what gnashing of teeth is really all about!!

Yeah, so I've lightened my load a lot now, but I'm always hoping: this better be the last time!!

Nothing really important... Just want to celebrlog (coinage: blogging in celebration!) and give myself a pat on the back cos i did well for my Psycholinguistics test!! I got 75/100 yeah!! Definitely in the top 10 of the class i think (approx 40-50 students)

I got 16/20 for the Metaphor and Discourse test. And for Understanding Irony, I got an A- for the presentation and B+ for Paper 1! All in all, these 3 modules each seem bound for at least B+, and hopefully A!

Sadly, I'm doing rather mediocre for the other 2 modules, Historical Variation in English and Sounds & Words. Hopefully I can get at least a B for each of them... Actually I feel quite bad about these 2 modules, cos I didn't put in my best. I decided that I didn't like them and went ahead to bochup them. If I score badly, I asked for it ... I should learn from Marcus's example: He didn't like his Econs module one bit, yet he has such a good attitude towards it ... Sense of excellence ... I need more of it .. =)

Anyhow, with God's grace, I should do fairly well this sem, seeing how I have been blessed in those 3 modules already. What's more, USP has revised the dismissal policy so that a CAP of less than 3.5 at the end of second year doesn't immediately mean I'll be kicked out ... still got chance!! Must get my Second Class!! =)

Well, I thought I'd blog today. Yes, it's been more than 3 weeks since I last blogged, and there has been happenings and all. I don't live that uninteresting a life, yo... Actually, this isn't the diary sort of blog, but more of the thoughts/opinions sort, but well, I do feel like putting some of the more significant events of the last few weeks down. In brief.

1. Exams
Okay, most of the time I wasn't blogging was during the exam period. No surprise, I'm sure. Well, the whole exam period seemed to last forever - rather agonizing, I thought. It wasn't an entirely pleasant experience, considering that I was rather ill-prepared for my papers. Yes, but at least I went through it with God's peace.

It wasn't all that bleak, of course. After all, I do have a rather positive outlook. Noteworthy is the fantastic fellowship that we brothers and sisters had during this period. Praying for each other before papers; the soups and "service" of those we finished early; the midnight suppers. Much of the time was spent in Science S16, in this seminar room we made our home. We managed to make the place pretty cosy and conducive for studying at the same time. Haha, and to finish the whole thing off, we had this overnight Warcraft session on the last night (most people had finished their papers)!!

2. Visit to NIE
After our exams, NTU/NIE has their turn, this week. Being the big extended family that we are, the NUS units went down to the lovely Nanyang Campus to bless our brothers and sisters there with encouragement, fellowship and food ... I heard NUS Pioneer even put up a short skit for the NTU people. West visited NIE. No skit, but we brought finger food, snacks and dessert. I already knew most of the people there, having served with them previously in other ministries, but also got to be acquainted with some new brothers and sisters in their group. The feeling that I got the whole time, and I'm sure the others would feel the same, was that the bonds we had were those of family, not friends. =)

The highlight of the visit for me was the chance to catch up with Peiqi. I haven't had the chance to chat with her for a long time and since she was rather free, I decided to stay behind when the rest of the West people were leaving. Hee, my house is just a bus away from NTU anyway ...

We had a good time, catching up with each other and also reminiscing about the days we spent in the SMU ministry. She's one of those people in church whom I feel I share a more special relationship with. It's not that we've known each other very long or very well, but that over time, we've developed some sort of mutual love and respect. We haven't spent much time together since we've both moved on from SMU, but the relationship has grown in the time since. This, through the warm greetings, the occasional encouragement, and perhaps most significantly, the shared knowledge that we were both part of something special and meaningful. Together. Unity can be such a powerful thing.

3. Kukup trip
Okay, I had wanted to blog this as well, but I want to go home now ... think I'll blog about this in another post ...

Did the most incredibly amazing thing today.

I went for the wrong tutorial. I was wondering why the class was so small, where did everyone go man? Maybe it's the rain. Hey, where's Benny? He pontang also? And then the class ended, and Benny was outside waiting to come in.

It dawned on me that I had just attended the tutorial one hour early! Champion sia ...

Well, it's been two years that I've stayed in PGP.

And only recently did I realise how good the food from the Thai stall is!! Argh, just when I've decided not to stay here next semester ... Anyway, it is a stall rather lacking in marketing, and I've almost never ordered anything from it because it's hard to tell what's available with just a glance.

Anyway, the other day I decided to try their fried rice, remembering that someone - Garry I think - once told me that it's good. And anyway, I'm a little tired of the Chinese cooked food stall, and I've started to have a dislike for the lady at that stall too - she can be all smiles one moment and then suddenly quite rude the next. SO, I tried the fried rice. Man, it was good! Completely worth the $3.50. Haha, I've been having fried rice for almost a week now ... I had it for both lunch and dinner today ... Yikes!

Oh, and I found a bargain at Georgie's - Heaven and Earth Honey Green Tea 1.5L - $1.60 ... That's not even the price of 2x 330mL cans!!

Before I go to church camp early tomorrow morning (Newton by 0630hr!), here's an entry that's a little overdue.

Well, on Monday, we held a farewell for the graduates in the West unit who are moving on to various other groups. It was a simple affair at Marina South. However, Benaiah, Marcus and I went crazy and decided to stay overnight at the nearby riverside.

More klogs to clear.

Last Wednesday, SJ, KC and I went to Music Plaza. It turned out that in line with the Great Singapore Sale, they were having promotions for some items, one of which was the CG-111S. Praise God! We were just here the week before when SJ wanted to buy a guitar that very day. Think it's really in God's timing that she didn't do so that time. And that she didn't buy anything at Davies on Tuesday. Because now she can get this rather excellent guitar at a $50 discount!

[rest of entry lost]

Just put some rice to cook. Got a meeting to attend later, but I'm going to have lunch at home. That's because I've been spending too much recently! Have to save some money, so must eat at home. Such a blessing to know how to cook, haha ... Found a big fish in the freezer but don't think I can finish it by myself =P

Here's what else I've been up to ...

[rest of entry lost]

Okay, Garry did a pretty good job describing the feast we had, together with Felicia, last Tuesday. I've been telling everyone how good the experience was, but I have not blogged about it yet. Blog-worthy it is, but since Garry has done it, I'm saved the trouble...

Read all about it here.

Coffee at midnight. Shiok! Qping would never dare to, cos she'll end up wide-eyed awake till 6am. Yeah, but for me coffee at night is just shiok.. It does keep me awake a little, but it's not that effective on me anymore. Which is a good thing, I can drink it for kicks.

Got a really great cup of kopi from the food court opposite my place. Best 70 cents I ever spent. The auntie making the kopi was a bit blur: I ordered takeaway but she made a cup, so that had to go to the uncle behind me. Turned out that was the last cup of the batch, and I had to wait for her to make a new batch. I seriously did not mind waiting, man! For the first cup out of a fresh batch of kopi? Yeah, I'll wait ... I'm sipping it as I type this ... Aaaahhhhh... shiok! I love all the espresso stuff, but really, a good good cup of kopi beats any latte hands down ...

By the way, I overslept this morning - again. Woke up 10 minutes before my lecture. Well, if I am staying in PGP, there remains the option of rushing and making it 15 minutes late. Haha, but when you stay in this obscure place called Gek Poh (somewhere near NTU), it takes an hour to get to school lah. So forget it. Argh, that's the second Islam lecture I missed in a row! From what I heard, I don't really miss much, but still I would rather be there.

Only good thing that results from this is that I get to eat lunch at home. Healthy food, and can save money. Well, I don't want to spend too much time cooking, so it's instant noodles. Topped with this super fibrous vegetable that I don't know the name of, and some slices of fishcake. I threw the Maggi seasoning away, I almost never ever use that. MSG, yucks.

Been a long time since I last blogged. Well, have been busy ... =/

Anyway, today is blog-worthy. I moved back to PGP. Block 11 - which means it's Type B and I have a wash-basin in my room. Pretty cool actually .. I can brush teeth in my room, get water for boiling, etc ... Anyway, I just checked in today and I've already moved in .. pretty impressive, if I say so myself. haha. Wheee ... looking forward to the great fellowship here. It's kinda like year one all over...

Ok, the other thing to blog about is ... I have a toothache! As in, for real, really painful persistent type. Woke up in the middle of the night with this really numbing pain in my lower right jaw. Ouch. Had to take painkillers. On Paracetamol even until now. What can it be? Decay? Wisdom tooth thingy? Must see dentist to find out. Sigh.

Okay, gotta get back to serious work!!

Haven't blogged for a long time .. don't really have the inspiration to blog nowadays also

Oh, but today is blog-worthy.. =)

A couple of buddies - Robert and HC - came over to my place to hang out today. Originally wanted to go Chinese Gardens to jalan-jalan, but it rained, so I thought my place would be nice ..

We watched DVD movies - Dodgeball and Bruce Almighty. We cooked lunch. We had a little wine with pasta. We popped corn. So much we couldn't finish. Crowded into my room, rearranged some furniture, switched the lights off, drew the curtains.. voila! Mini theatre, all comfy!

Such a good time .. think we all needed this little getaway in some way or another. Good shows, homemade popcorn and drinks, a comfy spot, and most of all, great friends. Till next time, pals!

I got a job!

*ahem*

I am now a school teacher. For the next five weeks.

It suddenly struck me how significant this is. I always knew this day would come - when the problem student (me) grows up, makes good and becomes a teacher himself. All my teachers who have lost hair over me, they will be so proud, I'm sure.

"Staff room" used to be the place where I had to go see my teachers, it's "their" domain. As of today, for the next five weeks, I have my own desk in the staff room. It's like I stepped over some sort of invisible line over to "the other side".

Poignant musing...

In case any of you think relief teaching is a walk in the park, it's not! First of all, workload wise, it's not lesser than the permanent teachers. I'm taking over a teacher who's resigned, so now I'm teaching all his classes. I'll be seeing a total of 9 classes, from Sec 1 Express to Sec 4 Normal Tech. Was a little incredulous when I realised that I'll be teaching 5 out of 7 of the Sec 1 classes English Literature. I'm teaching 71% of a cohort.

Oh, I have till Monday to read Adrian Mole. =) That's what we'll be covering for Lit.

I think Sec 1 Lit should be fun. It's my Sec 4 classes I worry about. I'll be teaching them English. I can't imagine what they will be like. Hopefully I can control them. Hopefully I can! or I'll lose my rice-bowl. The principal said that he'll fire us if we can't maintain order in the classroom. Challenge...

This is not a vacation internship/attachment centered around us, the undergrad on vacation. This is a school desperately short of teachers, which gives untrained relief teachers (us!) full teaching responsibilities. No walk in the park. They're hiring us to do real work. I even have to be form teacher of a class. 'nuff said?

Joel did try a little to warn me/dissuade me from working at her school, and I was personally hoping to find the "babysitting" sort of relief teaching too. But after she warned me about the "conditions" and even after I realised that it's not a cushy job, I decided to go for it still.

I shouldn't just be looking for an easy job where I'll just get paid and not learn much. I'm seeing this five weeks as an opportunity for experience and exposure. Bad experience is experience too. Subjecting myself to the expectations and stresses of a full-fledged teacher should be quite a learning experience. Working in an environment with bosses and colleagues with their good and bad sides should be a good preview of the 4 decades of life after graduation.

Joel might have tried to dissuade me (for my own good?) but haha, she seems really happy to see me in school. It's when fellowship is hard to come by that makes you treasure it. For those of us in the student ministry who see our brothers and sisters on campus everyday, we might not know what it feels like. When you're out there in the world and suddenly you have someone like-minded join you at the workplace. I believe it's like, yes! Someone to spend the most difficult part of my day with me! Well, she seems really happy. We're trying to see which days we have common lunch slots. =)

Monday will be here before long. Feeling a little afraid, challenged, excited. Just hope I can keep the job (not get fired) so that I can do all those things I said..

zzzz....

I bought myself a red pen today.

2 weeks have passed! I've lost the idealistic tone of new teachers. Bumped into Minna the other day. She told me she's decided to become a teacher. I discussed it with her like I've seen it all, the jaded sort.

Okay, a bit exaggerated but then, it's partly true. 2 weeks ago, I imagined what it would be like on Monday the 27th, first day I stepped into the classrooms. 2 weeks on, and things are not what I had imagined. For the better, mostly for the worse. Not that things are bad, but more perhaps I imagined things a little too rosy. Now having been through 2 weeks of the real thing - no more imagination - my feet are firmly on the ground.

Students are not as enthusiastic as I thought they might be. I'm especially disappointed by the Sec 1s. Don't get me wrong - they are mostly angels (simian ones perhaps). It's just that I got my hopes too high, and when their response to the lesson is lukewarm, I feel a little let down.

Faced with 5 classes unanimously complaining that Literature is boring, I had a brainwave to liven things up and perhaps get them to like Lit a little more by using popular music to teach poetry, in place of William Blake and friends. For the Express classes, I even taught them simple songwriting, thinking that they would be utterly excited at the prospect of writing their own songs. Sadly, it seems like more than half of them just sees it as homework, and are hardly thrilled. Hmph. Well, it's due next Monday. I really hope there will be some excellent work out of the lot.

Sec 4s are a headache. While I enjoy a comfortable relationship with them (i.e. they don't hate me), they are simply uncontrollable! My gosh, I dread going for sec 4 classes, and I see them everyday! Told Cheryl today that it feels like I'm running a day care centre, or perhaps playschool. Haha, yup, they're 16-year-olds and they behave like children. Both the good and the bad sides, of course. The hyperactivity, the uncontrollable noise, running around, playing (silly things like splashing water at each other). It gets really amusing, but then I'm always worried that they will cost me my job by being so rowdy! Yup, relief teachers get fired for not controlling their classes. Hmph.

Well, 2.5 more weeks. I think I look forward to the end of the job, not because I'm sick of it or tired of it. Nope, I'm still alright with the job. I look forward to when I can sever the official teacher-student ties with those jokers, and perhaps become friends with some of them. Already quite chummy with some, but the teacher(even though just relief) role does limit how far I can go now. Oh well, we'll see...

Went with my parents to the Cycle and Carriage showroom today. We're getting a new car, while the COE prices are down!!

They had their eyes set on the Mitsubishi Lancer 1.6 CVT Elegance. I managed to coax them into getting the Sports variant instead. Slightly more fanciful features, like the ultra-cool car stereo. Significant difference between Elegance and Sports is the looks. Erm, one looks elegant, while the other looks sporty. The Sports variant has black leather interiors! After we add dark window film, the inside will just look cool lah! Outside, the usual sports look - body kit, alloy rims, chrome exhaust.

Loved the Wine Red, think it goes really well with the black interior. But a red sporty car looks too young for my dad, according to him. Black would be nice, but out of stock, and we want the car this month, so too bad. So we got the blue one..

I spotted one in the car park, so I snapped it. Was a little hurried, so the photo leaves much to be desired, anyway i photoshopped it to make up:

Oh ya, now's probably a good chance to mention that I've recently acquired a 2nd-hand Canon Powershot G5 together with a rather complete set of accessories. It takes great pictures! Phew..

Back to the car... Oh yes, I can't wait to drive the new car *rubs hands with glee* Haha, suddenly I have a lot of drive to quickly get my license!

I met Minna (left) and Serene for supper just now. We were supposed to go to Plaza Sing for a movie, but they cancelled and the SMS got lost somewhere ... so I took 190 down to Lot 1, and we ended up at KFC. KFC closed but we had so much to talk about, none of us wanted to go home that early. After all, it's FRIDAY NIGHT (I never figured out what was the big deal about Friday night until I started working!).

Anyway, Minna wanted a durian, so we got one. I got some soya beancurd at the Block 302 coffeeshop - it's probably the best in CCK, used to dabao it back in NS days. Got drinks from Cheers, and off we went to a nearby void deck.

I've always been more or less in touch with Minna, but for Serene, man! We haven't seen each other for years! Oh, just to mention, we're primary school classmates! Yeah, you heard that right - primary school classmates. I've known Minna 14 years and Serene 13 years. We've seen each other grow up! haha, Serene remarked that I strike her as being mature. Thank God!

We talked about so many things - loans, bankruptcy, insurance, work, LKY, education system, life as teachers (me: relief, M: contract, S: trained), church, relationships... Minna gave us a short lesson on diamonds. After all, she's choosing a ring soon ... =)

Serene was apparently really blessed by the whole meet-up. Work has really gotten to her. She teaches primary school English and Science. Hmph, if my Sec 4s are such monkeys (ahem, ya, you monkeys :P ), primary school children must be worse. She said something funny.. "Finally I can use big words!" LOL and she's so happy she wants to meet up regularly every month! Sounds good to me ...

We talked about our primary school days, about our classmates, about our teachers, about how we were brought up. We're at that point in our lives where we're stepping over the threshold into adulthood. It's almost surreal, but we know we're there. Just look at the things we talked about. Oh man ... we have grown up. It's especially obvious when you're with friends you've known since childhood.

We shared a cab home. It was past midnight.

Okay, I'm now sitting at my new desk. Ace Daytons. It's an ad agency located in Red Hill area. Haha, no more long-sleeve shirts!! This is a t-shirt and jeans environment... how nice is that? haha

This place looks fun ... ok, we'll see... tata

9:56 waiting for work ..
10:31 came back from WIP meeting .. Works in Progress. Creatives meet Suits to keep each other updated on what everyone's doing

forgot to mention. I'm typing this on an iMac. antique man ... OS 9.2. Thank God I know how to use Mac. This whole place is ruled by Mac. I haven't seen a single PC yet.

10:34 am I going to get any work?! I've been here an hour. I want to work ..

the design guys get the G4s ... the copy people get old iMacs .. i can't find Photoshop on my Mac!! =(

10:50 okay great ... some work to do .. brain work .. thinking about ideas .. cool
11:01 think think think
11:06 stuck. quick think think!!!

I need more jeans and cargos..

12:07 i came up with 11 taglines for Healthy Lifestyle. not enough!! i must have more!
12:39 still 11 ...

This is what I found at my desk. A good craftsman needs good tools.

1:32 pant pant ... 13. when is lunch?!
1:55 slooooooowww day ... im being paid to sit around. give me some work!!
3:00 back from lunch. still no work.

6:11 end of day. ok good. Nadia, the perm copywriter taught me some of the ropes and let me proofread 3 ads. she'll be gone half the day tomorrow, so it'll be my show to run!

6:37 still here. had something to proof. Nadia's left. MSN messenger crashed on me.. hmph
6:39 ok. i think i can go.

I did the laundry, vacuumed the floor, tidied the living room, watered the plants and fed the fish today. Guai rite?

Macdonald's has a McNugget promo going on. Four special sauces. Okay, Lemon is not nice. The Sizzler one is not so special, the normal BBQ sauce is better, i think. Thai Spice is not bad, but so-so. Wasabi is pretty decent. Ah, i think the good old Curry sauce is still the best.

Watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory with Hanhui, Joel and Xiaozu in the evening. I read the book so many years ago that I can hardly remember the story.

I think my favourite part of the movie is the Television Room scene, where there was a tribute to Kubrick's 2001. I started to anticipate the moment I saw the apes on the TV. As the giant chocolate bar appeared, and the first notes of "Also Sprach Zarathustra" started to play, I recognised 2001 .. oh, and what happened next was so cool. I've always loved being able to spot cross-references!

Anyway, it was a nice show that looks as if it might have a sequel. After all, the book has a sequel.

Argh!!!! What a terrible waste of time! Yesterday wasted. So far today wasted. I can't stand it. I hereby conclude: I cannot stay at home! I will not do anything productive at home ..

That's it.. I am going out. And my laptop stays HOME! I'll just bring my thumbdrive out. No games etc, only documents... Okay, must get out of here NOW!

Robert and I celebrated Huichun's birthday on its eve, which is the best we can do (this year). =P Well, it was thoroughly enjoyable for all of us, I suppose. We reckoned that the last time we came close to something this fun was the time we did the popcorn thing.

So, yes, photos..

I'm working part-time at A-Star I²R. I find it hard to describe to people the nature of my job. Erm, in any case, the post is called Data Annotator - so I annotate data. Data in this case are text - words, sentences, paragraphs. So I sit in front of the computer and highlight words and draw relational links between them (anaphora and coreference chains, for those who understand). Yup, so that's my job.

It's not exactly fun, but it's rather interesting. I suppose a research institute is the only place where I could have found work dealing with linguistics. I mean, where else can you find a job overtly dealing with coreference? So yes, I'm getting a kick out of being able to apply what I learnt. And I get to learn more here too.. I hope I'm not the only E.Lang major who didn't know what appositions are, gosh.

Nice thing about this job is that it's flexible - I come in and out as I like, but gotta finish the project. Oh, and one perk is the pantry. I love the Milo the coffee machine makes - it's foamy and creamy!

*shrug*

Blogging is nice. It's cathartic to a certain extent. I'm a little moody now - the quiet kind. Like, if I could be in a nice lounge with nice music, with the company of a nice book, that would be nice. (I've used the word nice 6 times so far.) I can't, because I'm playing soccer with the NG1 brothers later. I don't have shoes, the soles fell off. I guess I will play with slippers or barefoot. I like my Teva slippers. I have hard-to-please flat feet, and the slippers are comfortable. Paying a bit more for quality products that are comfortable and durable is worth it. There's guitar lesson tomorrow, and I'm not prepared yet. It's the first lesson. I want it to be easy so that they can see simple results fast, like being able to play a simple song. I think I will find a song that has only 3 chords, teach the 3 chords, and hey, they can play a song! My job search has not been fruitful because I have not been faithful. I found a job that I really like, but I've been dragging the application for weeks. What's wrong with me? There are two schools of thought. The first is that one should get a job asap, any job. Starting to work is important, any job. You can explore the jobscape after you first have a job, any job. The other is that you should be careful and picky in searching for a job. That any job you choose should be one that suits you, so that you can do well in it. I think both are right. I joined the church photography special interest group. We learnt about colour at Tuesday's workshop. We had a photo shoot after the lesson, followed by critique. It was fun. This is a great ministry: the people are passionate, humble, warm and generous. Everyone's having great fun and learning from one another. I told them I took the photos for the ESS invite. They said I have 'the eye'. That was very encouraging. Thinking about what Hanhui said yesterday about one's calling, how one would be evidently enabled to do something surprisingly well, that it would surprise even yourself. I thought about it, and realised that I have always been getting much praise for the artistic work I do in church, sometimes the response I get from people surprise me. I was told that the church camp video was beyond expectations. Convocation is coming. It's exciting. It'll be such a big day. I'm still grateful to all the great teachers who didn't give up on me in the past, that I'm able to get this far in my education. Preparation for convocation can be a hassle. My mortar board does not fit me - it's too big. One size smaller is too small. The material is too thick to alter. What to do? I'll have to go to the Co-op and see what solutions they have. Otherwise, I shall just be really stiff-necked when I'm wearing it, so it doesn't fall off. My gown is too long, my mother will alter it for me. Oh, I want to get a longsleeve shirt with cufflinks. That'll be fun. And find a nice tie too. Talking about big days, just one day before mine will be Hanhui's. Really big day for him. Bigger than convocation. I get to be his official photographer for the day. So exciting. Will have to go for Saturday service next week then. Haven't been there for ages. My reservist is coming soon, at the end of July. Mixed feelings about that.

My father is really sweet.. He must have been a pretty good boyfriend (currently husband).. Just remarked a few days ago that I didn't have the mailbox key. Then presto! He put one on my keychain.. =)

Yesterday evening, after work, 5 of us (CL, YL, KK, RY and myself) went to Auntie Hamedah's place for dinner. She was very hospitable and the food was very good. And there was so much, we couldn't finish. She kept making us eat, and we were all so full. Kenyang sekali lah!

It was fun and everyone enjoyed themselves. Auntie is really motherly. Even in the office, she takes such good care of us. In our organisation with many offices across the island, our office is probably the cleanest, and we know why. Even at our individual workstations, she would arrange our clutter into some semblance of order. We're thankful that we're able to have such a wonderful relationship with her!